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Top 10 Best (and Worst) Reasons to Marry



He/she has a great apartment - You know what they say--location, location, location. Okay, seriously, you may really love that penthouse view, but no apartment is worth selling yourself for. Unless you live in New York, and then you gotta do what you gotta do!

Money - It's a game as old as marriage itself. If your partner (or their family) is loaded, it may feel like you're ensuring a comfortable life for yourself and your children. But there's a proverbial saying--easy come, easy go. Money doesn't last forever. And although it might make life easier, at times, it doesn't make you happy either. Marrying for money is always a bad decision. And, to make things worse, it can lead to a really nasty divorce.


Power - Like medieval monarchs, some people actually consider the political influence of their partner's family when searching for a mate. Are you looking to marry into a political dynasty, either to satisfy your own ambitions or those you might have for your partner? If so, you might want to think twice. Politics is an unpredictable game, and you may find yourself regretting the decision if your partner doesn't live up to all the hype.


She's Pregnant - Birth control pills aren't perfect. What if you're in that small percentile of couples who find themselves pregnant while using the pill? You may feel like you have no choice, but slow down, that's short-sighted thinking. You won't be doing your partner any favors by marrying them out of a sense of guilt. You need to take the pregnancy out of the equation and consider whether you would marry this person if there was no child involved. If you find that the answer is no, then you shouldn't marry them now either. You can still partner to raise the child without making a false commitment to each other. In the long run, your baby will be much happier living in two happy homes than in one unhappy one.


Peer Pressure - Okay, all your friends are doing it. So what? If your friends jumped off a cliff, would you follow? Everyone is different. Everyone has their own individual needs. And everyone looks happier from the outside. If you could be a fly on the wall, you might find that your married friends aren't really as happy as they pretend to be. Maybe they are. But you're the only one who really knows when you're ready to get married, when it feels right, and you shouldn't make the decision prematurely because you feel like you're lagging behind your friends in major life decisions. Wait until you know the time is right for you.


Pleasing Your Parents - Your parents really like her and want you to make her an honest woman. That's great. (If your parents DON'T like her, life can be miserable for everyone!) But this is just another (more complicated) form of peer pressure. The fact that your parents think she's an angel sent from heaven won't count for much in making the relationship work. You shouldn't get married for anyone but you. When the time is right, you'll know. Don't rush it for anyone else. Not even your parents.


Pity - Okay, so you feel sorry for her when she clings to you so needily. It's a real ego trip. But pity doesn't equal love. And once you get married, chances are she'll realize that you're not the perfect knight in shining armor that she thinks you are, and she'll look for answers elsewhere leaving you feeling confused and unappreciated. Her neediness (now) may inspire feelings of empathy and an urge to protect her, but this is a black hole of emptiness you can never fill. It's like trying to pay off a credit card and loanshark-like interest rates. Forking your life over as collateral is never a smart move.


Children - Children are great. They reawaken the child in you and open your eyes to all kinds of wonders you've completely forgotten. But if you're getting married just so he can knock you up, you might want to consider adoption or even a sperm donor first. If that doesn't work, at least make sure that your partner wants kids too--otherwise you may find yourself changing all the dirty diapers by yourself!


Sex - Great sex can feel like a compelling reason to get married. You may want to make the attachment permanent. After all, you don't want her in bed with some other guy! But sex has a way of dissipating over time. It's subject to the law of diminishing returns. In any relationship, you will go through periods where it's not as exciting as it used to be. You'll also go through periods where it's just as hot as that first time you got her clothes off, but if sex is the glue that holds your marriage together, you may find yourself in a sticky situation.


Love - There's really only one reason to get married. Love. When you find that special person, the one who makes you feel complete, the one you want to share every little moment with, every fibre of your being, then you've stumbled onto a happiness that some people go an entire lifetime without. Reward her/him with a lifetime commitment and enjoy the ride!

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